No not Victoria's Secret, that delightful self-help book. The secret is that there is no secret and I don't understand how someone could read that book and not feel cultish, weird, and a bit dirty. But that's just because I have a negative outlook and bring it to that book or so the story might go.
I actually think there is something to having a positive outlook on life, rather than dwelling on the negative, but unfortunately thinking positively about things doesn't actually make them happen. For the privileged folk spewing the fecal matter in this fine piece of print, I suppose this works. Or maybe one day they awaken in their vapid wasteland of a life.
But hey, I'm actually a relatively positive guy or positively a relative guy, I always get those confused. Take today, where I put on my shirt before my pants for about the first time ever and the result was such that I'd tucked only the back of my shirt into my waistband (when really none of it should have been tucked), and meanwhile my fly wasn't done up. Did I freak out? No, I took it in stride, laughed to myself and apologized to the large group of schoolchildren that had to witness it all.
Even with my fly down, my secret wasn't revealed.
Until next time internet, you stay data rich.
Showing posts with label Victoria's Secret. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Victoria's Secret. Show all posts
Friday, August 9, 2013
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
The 200
Yes, it's just like that movie 300, only a hundred less. So 200, right, it is the number of entries I have reached in this here blog. I like to think it's been a good ride, but as I only got cranking here in the middle of 2007, it's hardly worth reminiscing about all of the good times we've had. I mean, I had to use "good" twice in that last sentence, so while I might like to think things have come a long way, that is not the case. Plus, it's my own damn blog so I will tend to be biased. There are things in here I think are absolute doo-doo, and things I think are sort of worth reading and viewing — so long as you have a lot of free time and nothing better to do.
As I write this I am taking a break from a fiendish writing spree that, hours earlier, resulted in something I was working on taking a calamitous turn for the inconsistent. This is how my brain goes when I try to adopt different voices. That's why having this blog is fun — for me — it's a catalog of how I did write, how I do write, how I might write. And we write differently (at least I do) depending on all manner of context I really won't get into right now. Part of the reason for that is that I cannot possibly hope to cover all of the variables and, it may prove fiendishly boring. It appears I have fiends on the mind.
Another thing I have on the mind is tonight's Victoria's Secret Fashion Show (yes, I am aware it received heavy billing in my last post). I'm not actually going to watch it tonight, but my DVR is really excited. If it is half as good as last year's, I expect about a dozen viewings.
To truly celebrate 200, I should probably go and include a little more of my classically annoying wordplay and non-sequitur references. Editor's note: I was never much of one for that comic strip but still I remember it being in the Sunday comics before I even knew what a non-sequitur was. I still wonder if I have a full understanding of it, right along with dialectic (the most over-used term in my Sophomore seminar that I took, fittingly, as Junior), and well I can't think of another word that I know the meaning of but still feel a little nervous using like someone will know I used it wrong. That's why I don't like to force words. I did once confuse prolific and profound, going so far as to caption a photo I judged profound as "prolific." A girl then asked me if I meant "profound," when she embarrassingly found the photo on my computer. I should change that sentence because the modifier makes it seem she was embarrassed to find it, when it was I who was embarrassed she found it. It's ironic of me to have made an error like that when pointing out a past error except that since I am aware and now noting it, I suppose the irony has been stripped. I still think that photo produced plenty of...whatever. But I'm glad I eff up like that, it keeps you humble. And by you, I of course mean me.
And on that relatively lackluster note, I would like to thank myself for continuing to write in this blog despite no readers and no real topics or subject matter. If loving and thanking yourself isn't the definition of humble well, I just don't know what is! Happy end of November you s-and-d-o-b's. In honor of a band I used to listen to and a neighborhood I used to live near, I welcome my December.
As I write this I am taking a break from a fiendish writing spree that, hours earlier, resulted in something I was working on taking a calamitous turn for the inconsistent. This is how my brain goes when I try to adopt different voices. That's why having this blog is fun — for me — it's a catalog of how I did write, how I do write, how I might write. And we write differently (at least I do) depending on all manner of context I really won't get into right now. Part of the reason for that is that I cannot possibly hope to cover all of the variables and, it may prove fiendishly boring. It appears I have fiends on the mind.
Another thing I have on the mind is tonight's Victoria's Secret Fashion Show (yes, I am aware it received heavy billing in my last post). I'm not actually going to watch it tonight, but my DVR is really excited. If it is half as good as last year's, I expect about a dozen viewings.
To truly celebrate 200, I should probably go and include a little more of my classically annoying wordplay and non-sequitur references. Editor's note: I was never much of one for that comic strip but still I remember it being in the Sunday comics before I even knew what a non-sequitur was. I still wonder if I have a full understanding of it, right along with dialectic (the most over-used term in my Sophomore seminar that I took, fittingly, as Junior), and well I can't think of another word that I know the meaning of but still feel a little nervous using like someone will know I used it wrong. That's why I don't like to force words. I did once confuse prolific and profound, going so far as to caption a photo I judged profound as "prolific." A girl then asked me if I meant "profound," when she embarrassingly found the photo on my computer. I should change that sentence because the modifier makes it seem she was embarrassed to find it, when it was I who was embarrassed she found it. It's ironic of me to have made an error like that when pointing out a past error except that since I am aware and now noting it, I suppose the irony has been stripped. I still think that photo produced plenty of...whatever. But I'm glad I eff up like that, it keeps you humble. And by you, I of course mean me.
And on that relatively lackluster note, I would like to thank myself for continuing to write in this blog despite no readers and no real topics or subject matter. If loving and thanking yourself isn't the definition of humble well, I just don't know what is! Happy end of November you s-and-d-o-b's. In honor of a band I used to listen to and a neighborhood I used to live near, I welcome my December.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
Strong Enough for a Man
Ah Victoria's Secret (those are two separate links there guys, and gals, hehe). Yes, I just said hehe, but what the Hell? It's true that the image below is more like what I'm really getting at. With filming of the show completed (knowledge I have thanks to intel from my buddy Tom) I am pretty excited for the November 30th launch. Finally, something to look forward to after Thanksgiving, which is quite close to the highlight of my year. Food, family, and fecundity. I don't know why I picked that last word other than it makes for a third "f" and there is a rule of three. It could be vaguely relevant to the holiday. Anyway, back to Vicky's S.
Here's my favorite image from last year's show:
The thing is I'd never actually watched before last year and after reviewing past footage it appears I picked the right moment to decide to engage in viewership.
As the weather is nice I am about to embark on a run before daylight fades. Sometimes it's daylight savings, and sometimes it's daylight spendings. So I'll head out in my short-short shorts, comfortable in the knowledge that Henry Rollins wore shorter while performing. You perhaps get away with more when you have Henry's rep which, of course, is a mixed bag.
Speaking of mixed bags, or at least mixed nuts, I will relay the following. Back from a run and having forgot to hit "publish" I found this entry staring at me when I opened my computer. On my way I walked down the street shoveling bits of steak and lettuce into my mouth, the remnants of a delightful but structurally unsound carne asada torta. As I approached a crosswalk, I was asked by a woman of questionable chemical balance if I "would like to see Communism." Without waiting for a response, this woman directed me to the crosswalk lines which were not straight, but on an angle. I was tempted to respond that it depends what angle you're looking at them from, but I don't like to stir up too much trouble. Besides, she had a point, they'd repainted the line in an oddly-angled manner. Those reds...
Edit: taking this opportunity to drum up early excitement for it to be 11:11 on 11/11/11 in a year. It'll even happen twice. Save up those wishes fishes.
Here's my favorite image from last year's show:
The thing is I'd never actually watched before last year and after reviewing past footage it appears I picked the right moment to decide to engage in viewership.
As the weather is nice I am about to embark on a run before daylight fades. Sometimes it's daylight savings, and sometimes it's daylight spendings. So I'll head out in my short-short shorts, comfortable in the knowledge that Henry Rollins wore shorter while performing. You perhaps get away with more when you have Henry's rep which, of course, is a mixed bag.
Speaking of mixed bags, or at least mixed nuts, I will relay the following. Back from a run and having forgot to hit "publish" I found this entry staring at me when I opened my computer. On my way I walked down the street shoveling bits of steak and lettuce into my mouth, the remnants of a delightful but structurally unsound carne asada torta. As I approached a crosswalk, I was asked by a woman of questionable chemical balance if I "would like to see Communism." Without waiting for a response, this woman directed me to the crosswalk lines which were not straight, but on an angle. I was tempted to respond that it depends what angle you're looking at them from, but I don't like to stir up too much trouble. Besides, she had a point, they'd repainted the line in an oddly-angled manner. Those reds...
Edit: taking this opportunity to drum up early excitement for it to be 11:11 on 11/11/11 in a year. It'll even happen twice. Save up those wishes fishes.
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