Passover kicked off Wednesday night and while I've been seder-free since college, last year's reprisal made it a little odd not to have one this year. My family never did the long and involved "official" seder, but still had the plate and the accoutrements. Actually, "accoutrements" is inaccurate as apparently that pertains only to additional items worn by soldiers, but initially I was thinking I'd heard it used in other situations. I mean, the word is meant to be used in only very precise situations it appears, which is why the English language can be pretty silly sometimes; that, and it can also be spelled "accouterments." Why have two very similar spellings for the same sparingly used word? Is it meant to make things harder or easier on dyslexics perhaps? Don't know. Just another sign it's time for me to learn a new language.
Also, not sure if a certain jazz or pop has been missing in my more recent posts, but it gets that feeling sometimes since my mind has been preoccupied a bit of late. But that is neither here nor there and is the typical blogger's remorse that periodically rears its ugly head. That's the thing, no matter what, it's still a personal blog, so no matter what ends up dropping down, it's me.
Right so last year I thought I'd covered a lot of my beef with the commercialization of Passover and the establishment of a whole new "Kosher for Passover" industry in the past few years, probably even decades. I did a quick look back and could not find said post, but I know it's got to be there somewhere because, in particular, I know I have discussed the virtue of Kosher for Passover Coke over traditional market Coke, that being the use of cane sugar versus high fructose corn syrup. So it's no wonder that, as USA Today just reported, KFP Coke is selling like hotcakes to Jews and Goys alike. I'm also quickly realizing that a lot of my KFP rant might just have been delivered in the non-cyber world and that it's so ingrained (which I was going to type as engrained as, again, both are permissible...seriously English language, seriously) in my brain that I think I've written it down.
So let me tell you about something that I don't think is Kosher for Passover, and that is some of the clothing being worn by the teenage female Jewish population in my neighborhood. I already made note of this in an email to a couple of friends, so I'll hope they're not reading because I hate repeating myself, but this can go ahead and be a brief anecdote I will lie and say is worth hearing twice.
So there I am (and, incidentally, I say "so" a lot) walking back to my house after toiling in retail sales. Now it was a beautiful day. I never see people out in my neighborhood but couple the weather with it being a Jewish holiday and we are talking vampires smelling blood. Quickly I come upon two Jewesses, one in conservative early Spring attire and a pair of flats, the other wearing this sexy spring dress and black hooker boots (2-3 inches below back of knee). It was making her hips sway. I can't imagine she was much older than 16, certainly not over 18, and you never know with the hormones in milk these days. All I could think of was, "now that is how passover should be." The moral of Passover is clearly that you've gotta look sexy even when celebrating the suffering of your ancestors that helped get you to where you are today.
In honor of that I ran shirtless in my newest pair of shorts that, when the wind flaps, expose the side dimples on my buttocks. So get out there and rock your bod...for Passover's sake, and don't ever forget to Borei Pre Hagafen...