There are so many intelligent and articulate people covering the hard-hitting
issues in our country these days, that I felt it was my duty to cover the
rather inconsequential bullshit that tends to make up the vast majority of
our lives. Actually, I'll just be griping a lot which, if you weren't aware,
doubles as a synonym for complaining, and as a descriptor for
a sharp pain in the bowels.

Friday, November 9, 2007

Dreams of Multicolored Calcium Pills

I would have said vitamins, but that wouldn't be specific enough. The other day which, by now is probably at least a week ago, I dreamt of multicolored calcium pills for some reason. That's all that sticks out as particularly vivid. The only reason I bring it up is because I wanted to drop something on the blogosphere before I am likely without interweb for a few days.

Yesterday I decided to shave for the first time in, well I can't even remember to be honest. I simply happen to be against a cleanshaven face because it a) makes me look a healthy 16; b) requires some solid razorburn-inducing upkeep; and c) did I mention I look 16? Plus I need maxiumum hair distributed around my head and face to balance out my crazy eyebrows. But you've got to mix it up every now and then because it's fun to look like an entirely different person. If God did not intend for man to shave, He would not have provided man with the intelligence to invent the razor, although I remain baffled as to how Adam dealt with follicular outbreak. I always threaten to shave my dad's beard since I have never, not even in photographs (save those of his extreme youth), witnessed him sans beard, but these are empty threats because we all know certain things aren't meant to be seen. It'd be akin to seeing Dr. Claw's face in Inspector Gadget except that apparently they've already done that. Trust Hollywood and greedy toy marketers to fuck that up. Bastards…

In the meantime I've got to pack, maybe set up some Domino Rally and, if I were smart, shave off the mangled mane atop my domepiece.

2 comments:

  1. So bogus! That guy is right, Dr. Claw should look like that Destro robot dude. What a crock.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'll email you with my facebook "badge" so you can look me up that way.

    Ya!

    I actually went to try and look some other people I had on OD and everyone deleted or was deleted :(

    AND I never knew they showed Dr. Claw's face! what the hell!?

    ReplyDelete

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