There are so many intelligent and articulate people covering the hard-hitting
issues in our country these days, that I felt it was my duty to cover the
rather inconsequential bullshit that tends to make up the vast majority of
our lives. Actually, I'll just be griping a lot which, if you weren't aware,
doubles as a synonym for complaining, and as a descriptor for
a sharp pain in the bowels.

Monday, December 22, 2008

NJ Trans[h]it

Frequently I talk trash about NJ Transit on here. It's true that I find it frustrating at times, but is it really worth complaining about? If my biggest gripe is late trains and rude passengers, I'd say I have things pretty good. That said, I have to say that it's been smelling like a hot dump on the train pretty frequently of late. I found amidst many notebooks and notepads that I scribble nonsense on a scrawl detailing that, last Monday, not just the train, but all of Penn Station had a distinctly fecal odor about it.

Aside from the Penn Station experience, I have to wonder if it is really just someone in my train car periodically dropping a deathbomb of a fart, as opposed to an ingrained doodieous scent, as the smell never seems to linger too long after my entering the car. Either that or I'm guilty of olfactory fatigue/adjustment after sitting in its presence too long.

On a non poop-scented train ride last Thursday night, I had a bit of a strange experience that probably isn't really that strange but allow me to explain. I got on an 8:35pm Jersey-bound train, seating myself next to a woman in her 40s or perhaps 50s. An announcement for all the intended stops of the train was made, which included my own, Edison. Shortly thereafter, a passenger seated just behind us could be heard conversing with a conductor to purchase a ticket to Edison, which he obligingly sold. The conductor then came to where myself and this lady were seated. After we flashed our respective month passes, this woman proceeds to inform me, having looked at my pass evidently, that "this train doesn't stop at Edison." I thanked her for her concern but assured her that it did in fact stop there. She refused to believe me and I left it at that. Shortly thereafter, another announcement was made, again detailing the arranged stops, and again listing Edison among them. I was a little tempted to say, "see you dumb bitch," and perhaps enlighten her to some other context clues that would have informed her I was on the correct train but, seeing as how she really hadn't been mean about it there wasn't any point.

I did ponder mightily for a minute or two, however, why she would even point this out. You might think, "well she was just doing you a favor," except that, if I were on the wrong train, wouldn't the conductor have mentioned something (in my past experience when i have witnessed people on the wrong train, the conductor has mentioned it to the passenger)? Wouldn't he also not have sold a ticket to that very stop to another passenger. Also, doesn't she have ears? Couldn't she hear them announce my stop. She certainly had eyes though, as she had to read my ticket to know where I was going as I mentioned. So maybe she missed all these initial signs. I hope she heard that second announcement, however, and realized she was a retard.

Hooooot pockets...

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