There are so many intelligent and articulate people covering the hard-hitting
issues in our country these days, that I felt it was my duty to cover the
rather inconsequential bullshit that tends to make up the vast majority of
our lives. Actually, I'll just be griping a lot which, if you weren't aware,
doubles as a synonym for complaining, and as a descriptor for
a sharp pain in the bowels.

Monday, April 14, 2008

Happy Tax Day Everyone

Alright, so I am admittedly a day early on this one, but I only mailed off my taxes today so I figure what the hell.

The first thing I thought I would share is this little mock letter sent to the IRS, courtesy of the Mac Owners Support Group newsletter that periodically arrives in my inbox. This is credited to forum user "Griffin," and I would like to thank him (or her) for this spot of humor on what might otherwise prove a gloomy day:

Dear Internal Revenue Service:
Enclosed you will find my tax return showing that I owe $3,407 in taxes. Please note the attached article from USA Today, dated 12 November, wherein you will see the Pentagon (Department of Defense) is paying $171.50 per hammer and NASA has paid $600 per toilet seat. I am enclosing four (4) toilet seats (valued @ $2,400) and six (6) hammers (valued @ $1,029), which I secured at Home Depot, bringing my total remittance to $3,429. Please apply the overpayment of $22 to the "Presidential Election Fund," as noted on my return.

You can do this inexpensively by sending them one (1) 1.5" Phillips Head screw (see aforementioned article from USA Today detailing how H.U.D. pays $22 each for 1.5" Phillips Head Screws). One screw is enclosed for your convenience.

It has been a pleasure to pay my tax bill this year, and I look forward to paying it again next year.

A Satisfied Taxpayer

On the Macintosh front as well, my buddy Max steered me to this earlier today. Whether or not you clicked the link, the band is called Hot Lava and while I may have been expecting a bit of a Weird Al rendition of "Blister in the Sun" for "JPG in the Sun," I was pleasantly surprised by the indie, lo-fi sound, which would have proven less of a surprise if I scrolled all the way down and read the tags for the post.

And since I managed to bring up the Violent Femmes I'll leave you with a little "American Music."

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